Friday, January 28, 2005
It had been almost a week and half that he had went away to work...sailing again at last...I cried the night before he went away...and suddenly got this really heavy cloud up on my head.. only to be told that I got another day extra because the ship is yet to be here in Port Klang...but it really doesn't matter anymore...he still had to go...anyway
I'm not sad ...neither happy...I just felt that I'm lost...in my own thoughts and feelings..and I don't feel like communicating either...He hates me everytime I stopped talking to him...everytime I kept something to myself...but hell he doesn't wanna hear that I'm sad too...so what choice do I have anyway.
"He asked me what do I want?"
T-shirt...stuff...not really, the only thing that I want is HIM...to be near me...everyday.
So he said some more...
"Don't worry I'll be back at 4.00 p.m...just like evrybody else who is workin'"
Hah...hah but I knew his 4.00p.m will be like hell...to reach
Because his 4.00 p.m. will took about six months...and by six months well that's a lot of possibilities.
"I'll be back...don't worry"
Waaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! right...till we meet again then...
"So when I'm gone please...pray a lot...get your log book done...visit your mom as often as you could...be good girl...keep some money...don't go shopping...I'll go with you when I'm back (wot? six months without shopping was like killing my soul)....That's all I guess."
So here I'm counting the days again...emm...it is really an easy thing to do counting...but waiting is another thing to do...and I guessed being the one who been left behind is the one who felt sad the most..." like it's better if you dump someone rather you being dumped?...some sort like that idea...whatever
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
Yesterday I guess I would really love it...if I could...to be one of those blue green monster...and go amok all around KL.
Emmm...I couldn't digest any info...I'm hungry and something been hammering on my head...I got my boss suddenly interested that I'm back from long holidays...so he started to question me bout my work...and to wrap it all could you get it done by the end of the day...so I happily said "OK"
I almost knocked down a motorcyclist...and a kelisa while I reversed the car...I really can't really think...honestly...I felt numb and I felt like all I really want to do was to scream..."What the hell is goin' on?"...
It all happened because of the 10k thang...emm ...how am I gonna get rid of emm...immediately...the answer will be ...
a. Work your ass off
b. Married a tycoon
c. Nothing
Hah...just kidding...
But most of all when I heard..."hey I will be back to work...soon...Do you hear me? " And on that particular sentence...I could think no more...anymore
Thursday, January 06, 2005
Ok it got all those but maybe not in a right sequence that I wrote in the paper...
1.Pray a lot - This is on no.3...but HIMSELF said this must be on the first spot...so that's why I put it first...and yes he read my resolution and commented and laughed...ouchhh!!!
2.Do not procrastinate
3.I want to be 48kg...so I hafta eat less and exercise more...but currently I'm not exercising but eating less...
4.I want to spend less and save more at least, 200 per month of my salary get into my saving account (well this is a continous effort to last year or the other year resolution...heh..heh) and to be honest I already waive this for this month of January...I don't have extra 200 to be save...
emm and I got my debt up to my nose these days...I hope the mission to clear it up will be successful...
5.Family comes first
6.I wanna join salsa class...ermm this one has not been included but I got the idea when I read FEMALE December'04 or maybe January issue.
7.I wanna be a volunteer...I'm going to send my form to this charity organization...and this also not included in the paper...and part of the reason is to kill my time...when HIMSELF is going back to work...so that I don't sit still all day long and have him poison my mind...about how I miss him
Hmm...I don't remember the rest...I'll update it when I saw the paper again... Hope that this is not just paper writing...but something that turn to reality...hu...hu...
Anyway listed below were 2004 resolution;
Let me see
a. To save money on monthly basis..at least 100 - emm not happening in 2004 to be continued in 2005 with 10% increase
b. To spend less on unnecessary things - emm slim chances even in 2005...I guess
c. To be a better person..than last year..hah..had. - Dunno if it really happened
d.To break up with my boyfriend if he didin't ask my hand for marriage this year. - Very much succesful now I'm better off and happily engaged to Him till the end of 2005...hehe
e.If (d) happens..then..I might be thinking of furthering my studies overseas..uk sounds nice..maybe australia..I figure that out later - Emm K.I.V till end of 2005...
f. To go travelling as often as I could - A very happening trip to Fraser, Pulau Besar Mersing, Cameron Highlands and etc...so this is happening in 2004
g.To work harder and more serious..compared to last year.. - emm I'v e been there and do that
h. To workout my body..so I will maintained what ever the shape I'm now - Unfortunately I met HIMSELF and all of sudden I just can't help it but to stuff myself (sangat berselera sekali) with food so I become fat (Don't get me wrong and don't be mad ok yang...I'm just so glad that we mat...ske...ske...ske)...Arggh and so my battle to stay slim continue in 2005 he..heh
So much for the resolution...gotta go!!!
Monday, January 03, 2005
Emm...so I've been abandoning the blog again...this time I'm not busy...I got a hell lotsa time and whole lotsa things to said...
For instance, I'm broke and I really don't know what to do...I'm in hell lotsa debt...I think I'm starting to be like the figure in the Shoppaholic series...
I'm bored and I can't do much about it...I will be on leave tomorrow but I don't know where to go...The Tsunami has blew out my plan...I still be on leave tomorow anyway.
But wot to do?...
And at this moment there was this guy on the phone offering me the bloodyhell VIP card that I had to pay at RM 480...and I don't give a damn but I'm still hangin' on the line...And I don't know why...duhh??
